Wednesday, December 9, 2009

A Time My World Changed

New Hood

Saint Paul, Minnesota
That was my hood
17 years of memories
3 years of Johnson High
life was good as each day changed
'til that day came
We found a new house they said
Brooklyn Park
I can feel the tears building up behind my eyes
the atmosphere was different
the streets were clean
the mall sucked
gone, everything was gone
this was my new home
I left my heart in Saint Paul

8 comments:

  1. i like this poem because i can somewhat relate to this i was born over north and grew up there and then came to champlin and had to switch up my whole attitude still till this day champlin doesn't suit me... thats why i go over north all the time.. and i have to still learn the ways of this school.. i love this poem ..

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  2. sad but u still have friends hear so don't stress just vent to me if need...nice flow and rhythm

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  3. It needs more flow, and more imagery. It's like you're telling us what happened to you, when you should try to show us more. Show us how you felt.

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  4. I like it i think the number are a nice touch because you get a feel for how much you love it in Saint Paul.I think you should add more things on what you like about it there and what you don't like about here

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  5. i get that moving is crapy but keep going, an i thik the peom really let it out. but like push more of the feelings out than it will pop i think

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  6. This is a good poem.
    It really showed how you felt.

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  7. i like the little bit about the mall sucked. Hah a nice comical break I LOLed.

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  8. It gives me a nice picture to see as you describe what happens. But give a little more words to describe your emotions as you went through that hard transition.

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